I’ve learned to be passive in our conversations.
When I’ve gone into a room with friends, I’ve avoided speaking to them directly.
Instead, I tend to be silent in the background, allowing my partner to tell the story of the conversation.
I can be in the room when the conversation is over and not hear the conversation if I’m still waiting to speak to them.
That’s why I find passive communication difficult when I’m trying to communicate through my partner.
But it’s not impossible.
Passive communication is a skill that you can learn to acquire over time.
And it doesn’t have to be difficult.
It just has to be easy to learn.
Here are a few things you can do to learn to be more passive: Don’t be afraid to ask questions.
When you’re at home, you have to make your own rules about what you can and can’t say.
That means that you have no idea what your parents will be saying.
You also don’t have any control over how the conversation will go, so you have little control over the way you express yourself.
As a result, you can be very defensive and defensive at times.
I’ve seen people respond by trying to avoid the topic altogether, or by avoiding conversations altogether.
The problem is that it’s really hard to avoid a conversation when you’re not able to control it yourself.
Passive conversation skills: Read the book on passive communication by John Oster.
Learn how to become more aware of your feelings.
When we’re alone, we naturally want to feel safe.
When our minds are not connected to the physical world, it’s easy to become defensive about feelings.
To build your sense of safety, you’ll need to pay attention to what your body feels and what your feelings are like.
This is called the embodied self.
You can learn more about the embodied and embodied cognitive skills with this video: What it is to be an embodied self, with Paul Harris.
When passive communication is easy, it can also be easy for us to get defensive and not listen.
So be mindful when you do passive communication.
Listen with a neutral tone.
This can be difficult for us.
But we all have different needs.
And when you listen, your partner is going to be able to tell you what they need to hear.
If you can’t do this, you’re going to feel defensive and angry.
So try to be neutral and listen without taking offense.
You may even learn to understand what your partner needs to hear when you ask questions that they might not be able or willing to hear from you.
For example, if you want to make sure that your partner isn’t having a problem, you might ask them to describe what’s happening in their own words, but you can also just tell them that you need to know the truth.
You might even ask them if they have a problem with what you’re saying.
If they don’t respond, you could try another question.
It’s important to be listening.
I have found that when my partner is comfortable listening to my questions, I’m much more likely to be a better listener.
When they’re uncomfortable listening to me, I get angry and defensive.
Passive communications: Make a plan to change the conversation If you’re in a relationship where your partner doesn’t always speak up, you probably need to change their tone.
When your partner becomes angry or defensive, it creates a lot of tension in the relationship.
You don’t want to become the passive partner.
You want to be the active partner.
Here’s how you can make the change.
First, ask your partner what they’re doing right now.
If it’s okay for them to be quiet, then you can say things like, “I’m so sorry.”
Or, “Don’t be so loud.
I just need to talk.”
Then, when you can no longer speak directly to your partner, you ask if they’re comfortable talking to you about something.
If your partner says they are, then ask if you can try to talk.
If both parties agree to try to work through the issue, you should be able get the issue to go away.
It takes a lot to get to this point.
You need to work on how to use passive communication effectively.
For this, I suggest you find a book or resource that’s specifically focused on the topic.
Then try to take the next step by asking your partner to sit next to you in the conversation so that you and your partner can talk.
I’m not saying that passive communication isn’t important for your relationship, but it’s important for you as a couple to learn how to do it effectively.
The best way to learn is to practice.
There’s no right way to be in a passive conversation, but the best way is to learn by doing.
Learn more about how to be successful in the passive communication skill game with this guide: How to be socially awkward when you talk to your parents.